Acknowledgeing My Submissive Ways

it all started when i was in my mid teens. i knew i was a little different from other girls my age, i didn't have the desire to go out and party and have a different boyfriend for every month. i always imagined what my life would be like with the one person that i wanted spend it with. i saw me being the SAHM/W and doing the cleaning, cooking and taking care of the kids and him, while he worked. i knew that when he comes home from work i would have dinner ready and waiting on him, i knew that i would do anything he asked of me without a second guess. i wanted the man to be the man and give me rules so i would no what lines i cant cross. not only did i want someone to dominate me in my everyday life but i also wanted to be dominated when it came to the bedroom. to me this was normal but when i saw and heard other girls talk i knew i could never tell anyone. as i got older i started to feel different things and dream different things. i really thought for along time that i was sick or something was wrong with me.  my sexual fantasies were becoming more dark and in a way sinister. i would dream about being kidnapped and my captor having his way with me and forcing me to do things, i would wake up thinking that i was sick for these dreams and for the fact that i was very turned on by them. i tucked them away in the back of my mind hoping they would stop but they never did. i never knew why i felt like this and what it meant and i was terrified to say anything. i tried to have "normal" relationships but i was never satisfied with that.  i needed more, i craved more. i didn't find out what all of this meant till i was 24 yrs old, i am now 25.  i was reading a journal post that a friend had done, and that was when i realized that i wasn't a freak and that there were others like me. i learned that there was actually a lifestyle for what i wanted and it was BDSM. i learned that what i was and was feeling was called submissive. after i began to embrace this new found lifestyle, i became more open to it. i have met the man of my dreams and he is now my dominant. for the first time in my life i am finally happy and fully satisfied with my relationship.